


Answer Me to the Last Cry

by keylimepie



Series: Every Day You Play (Neruda) [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s05e08 Changing Channels, Episode: s05e10 Abandon All Hope..., Episode: s05e12 Swap Meat, Episode: s05e13 The Song Remains the Same, Episode: s05e19 Hammer of the Gods, Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Episode: s05e10 Abandon All Hope..., Prayer, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-08-31 23:54:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8598826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keylimepie/pseuds/keylimepie
Summary: After the events of Changing Channels, Sam reaches out to Gabriel.





	1. the storm whirls dark leaves

Sam got out of the Impala and stalked into the motel room. The stink of burning holy oil still filled his nostrils. He scowled at the garishly painted flowers on the wall as he grabbed his things and ducked into the bathroom for the first shower, ignoring Dean’s grumbling. He couldn’t stop thinking about Gabriel’s face as they had walked away. Couldn’t stop hearing the distressed words from the archangel’s lips as he talked about his family. Sam’s heart ached when he thought about the harsh words Dean had responded with, knowing all too well how much it hurt to have Dean hurling blame and anger when one already felt like crap. And he, Sam, had just stood there and said nothing. He had looked at Gabriel with sympathy and sadness, true, but he had stayed silent. Of course, he was still angry and hurting from the last few days’ events, but once again, once Gabriel had explained himself, it was possible to forgive. Sam could not forget that Gabriel had heard his pleas back at the Mystery Spot and had given him Dean back. 

Of course, and that had been why. Gabriel really did understand. He knew how badly it hurt to love your brother and not be able to save him from his stupid fate. And had anyone ever been there to listen to him? Maybe that was why he’d given up and felt like the worst outcome was inevitable. He’d left his family and had no one, it seemed. For centuries, maybe millennia. 

Sam hastily finished his shower and dressed. He hurried past a confused Dean and went outside. “Need a walk,” he said by way of explanation. Sam walked across the parking lot and down the road until he came to a small park with a picnic table nestled between trees. The place was empty. Sam sat on the table, feet propped on the bench, and folded his hands in front of himself. 

“O Holy Archangel Gabriel,” Sam began uncertainly, then cringed at how ridiculous he sounded. He could just picture the trickster laughing at him. He sighed deeply and continued. “Gabriel, if you can hear me, I wanted to say that…“ Well, crap. What _did_ he want to say? “I want to tell you that I’m sorry. I wish I had said something, back there. You… you might not feel heard, but I want you to know that I heard you.” Sam’s voice cracked a little. “If, um. If you want to talk about anything, I’m here. I’m just… I guess you can’t find me easily because of the sigils so… oh God I have no idea how to…” He frowned. Was it weird to give your cell phone number over prayer? Was anything about this not weird? “Um, so you can call me. 913 472 5732. You know, if you have a phone. Or if you can get one. Um, anyway…. Amen?” he finished uncertainly. 

Suddenly there was a warm, solid body pressed against his back. “Well that was… novel,” Gabriel said dryly, leaning against the hunter. “Probably goes up there in the top 100 weirdest I’ve gotten.” 

“Hi,” said Sam in surprise. “Wow, I didn’t think you could find me. Cas said-” 

“Word to the wise, Sam. Prayer forms a link. I can follow it to you.” There was a crinkle of a candy wrapper, and the gentle jostling of Gabriel’s head against Sam’s shoulder blades as he chewed. 

“Gabriel, how are you?” Sam asked tentatively. Gabriel twisted around, a rustling shifting of fabric between them. He scooted across the picnic table to sit beside Sam, peering at the man curiously. 

“I’m… good?” he said in confusion. “Dean rained on my parade, remember? I was free before you yahoos even left.” He held out the candy bar toward Sam, silently offering a bite. Sam shook his head. 

“Yeah, I know that. I was just worried- look, I kind of know what it’s like. You seemed upset.” Sam shifted uncomfortably. Was he pushing? Maybe this was going too far. Gabriel had tensed up beside him. 

“I am,” Gabriel said quietly, after a moment. “I am, and I can’t- oh, fuck, Sam, I can’t do anything about it!” he cried, raking his hand through his hair. “You two could have just gotten it over with for me, but you’re just not going to, are you? So I guess I just… I dunno, kick back and have some fun somewhere until the end.” Gabriel heaved a sigh. “It’s been a pretty long existence, anyway.” 

“Do you have to be so defeatist, though?” Sam asked curiously. “I mean, why not try to come up with a plan with us? You know, Dean and I, we don’t really see any point in giving up ever, you know?” 

“Oh, I hadn’t noticed,” Gabriel said wryly. Sam snorted a laugh at that and grinned, his dimples deepening. Their eyes met but Gabriel quickly looked away. 

“I just mean, why give up until it’s truly, absolutely over? Why not take every chance we possibly can, every way we can think of, to make everything right?” 

“Yeah, okay Pollyanna,” Gabriel replied glumly. “Well what do you have cooking in that noggin, anyway? Tell me about your great plans.” 

Sam pursed his lips. “Well… nothing yet,” he admitted sheepishly. “Was kind of hoping that you had something. Trickster you, not Archangel you. Before.” 

“I’m the same guy, Sam,” Gabriel said gently. “No matter who else I am, I’m always just me.” 

“Yeah,” Sam said, studying Gabriel’s face, fixating on those eyes of warm gold. Those gold eyes had been appearing in fragments of dreams for years. Sam’s head was spinning, he was sure he would fall off the table, and just when he was starting to wonder if this gaze meant that he should take the chance and lean down for a kiss, it began to rain. 

“Well on that note,” Gabriel said, standing up on the bench hastily. “Things to do, blah blah blah. If I come up with any brilliant plans I’ll be sure to let you know.” He raised his fingers to snap, but stopped and grinned at Sam. “Keep in touch, kiddo? You know how to reach me. And now I’ve got your digits if I need you,” he added with a wink. Then with a snap, he was gone. 

Sam stood up and looked around him. The sun was starting to set, and the rain was picking up. He slogged back toward the motel room, confused and unsettled. 


	2. curl round me as though you were frightened

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in/after "Abandon All Hope."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://hellopoetry.com/poem/9920/every-day-you-play/
> 
> This is the poem where the title & chapter titles are coming from. I'm not sure why; it's just speaking to me right now.

The bomb was almost complete, and it was almost time for Sam and Dean to make their escape. Sam glanced around the hardware store. Dean was finishing the wiring of the trigger for the bomb, Ellen was sitting beside Jo, murmuring something soft against her hair. Sam knew he only had a few moments. He slipped away from the main room of the store and into a supply closet. 

“Hey, uh, Gabriel,” he began in a low voice. “I haven’t heard from you and… I just wanted to let you know that we’re-“ 

“Sammy, this is no time for a fondling your tool moment!” came Dean’s voice. “Get your ass out of the closet and come help me with this box of nails.” Dean scowled at him as Sam stepped out into the main room and helped him move around bomb components. Sam knew he would not get away again to finish his prayer. 

It was much later when Sam was able to find another moment to himself. Once they had returned to Bobby’s, he wandered off down the rows of junk cars, his heart heavy with sorrow. This time, he dropped to his knees, his head bent, forehead pressed into his clasped hands. “Oh, Gabriel, it all went so wrong,” he began, his voice hitching with a sob. “I don’t know how to keep going.” 

“I don’t know how either, but I know you will,” came the reply. Sam looked up at the archangel leaning against the car in front of him. He had an enormous bag of Reeses Pieces and was tossing them into his mouth, one by one. He quirked an eyebrow at Sam’s penitent pose. “I hadn’t pegged you for a submissive, Sammy, but I can work with it.” 

Sam just started crying harder and collapsed onto the cold ground, curling up into fetal position. Gabriel’s face crinkled immediately into concern. He dropped the bag of candy and knelt in front of Sam, a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, hey there kiddo,” he murmured soothingly. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to- do you want to tell me what happened?” 

“My friends are dead,” Sam choked out. “We thought for sure we could kill him, but it turns out the Colt won’t kill him. He just healed it over!” 

“Him- wait, what? Do you mean my brother?” Gabriel frowned, smoothing his fingers through Sam’s hair. “Have you _seen_ him?” 

“Yes. There were dozens of reapers in the town, and Meg and a bunch of hellhounds, and the hellhounds got Jo, and Lucifer trapped Cas but he got out, but Dean and I went and talked to Lucifer. Dean shot him but he just got back up again.” 

Gabriel drew in a shaky breath. “Oh, Sam. Kid, I could have told you that that magic demon gun ain’t gonna work against an archangel. If you’d asked...” 

“You never call,” Sam said bitterly. 

“Neither do you,” answered Gabriel. “No, I did get your call earlier, but I never did figure out what you were talking about and then you were gone.” He pulled Sam to sitting and brushed the dirt off of his jacket gently. “So what did my bro say to you?” 

“Lots of things. He was… oh my God, Gabriel, he killed a whole town. He was trying to raise Death. I don’t understand… but he says that I’ll accept him in six months in Detroit.” Sam looked at Gabriel desperately. “So, have you had any ideas?” 

“Sam, Sam, Sam… you gotta stop poking the hornet’s nest, kid. Lay low. Don’t go looking for him, with half-cocked ideas about killing him. Curl up somewhere far away. On a beach. Rum drinks. Pretty girl on each arm. Live it up.” 

Sam snorted. “Sounds more like your M.O.” 

“Well that’s my idea, yeah. You, I suppose you’re more the type to curl up in a library with a stack of books and one sweet and devoted girl at your side.” 

Sam flinched, immediately reminded of Saturday afternoons at the library with Jess. “Yeah, that’s not going to happen either.” 

Gabriel shrugged. “Look, I don’t care if you work on your stamp collection or start a flea circus. Just don’t go trying to kill my brother again. You can’t beat him. No one can beat him. Daddy, maybe… but that, as you say, ain’t happening. Just avoid him for as long as possible, enjoy what you have left. Spend time with your brother.” Gabriel paused, sighing. “I know you boys had your problems but you still… you still have something. You have no idea how lucky you are.” 

“No, I know,” Sam said. “I mean, he gets pissed at me over a lot of things and he doesn’t always trust me, but… yeah. I know I have my brother.” He looked at Gabriel sadly. “I’m sorry you-“ 

Gabriel cupped his hand around Sam’s cheek. “I’m happy for you though,” he said. “Gotta go, kid. Give me a holler next time you’re thinking about doing something stupid so I can talk you out of it, okay?” Gabriel raised his hand, and before Sam could get the word ‘stay’ past his lips, Gabriel was already gone. Sam sat there on the ground for a while, his hand pressed to the warm spot on his cheek where Gabriel’s hand had been. 


	3. you are like nobody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in/after "Swap Meat"

“Gabriel, you’re not going to believe this, but I’m stuck in the wrong body. Wait, what am I saying? Of course you’ll believe it. I’m stuck in suburban hell and I’m not sure how I got this way, and Dean’s not answering the phone. I thought maybe… you can help? Gabriel? I hope you don’t mind me asking. Just seems like this is your kinda thing, you know?” Sam looked around the teenager’s bedroom. He waited a moment. No sign of a snarky archangel. “I guess that’s a no,” he continued. “Sorry to have bothered you, O Mighty Archangel. Have a nice night. Enjoy your rum drinks. A-freaking-men.” Sam laid down on the bed and clutched a pillow, trying not to think about Gabriel with bikini-clad women hanging on him. Curled up on a lounge chair together. Them rubbing sunscreen into every inch of his golden skin. Dammit, archangels didn’t even need sunscreen. But Gabriel wouldn’t correct them, Gabriel would just let them run their beautifully manicured hands, not gargantuan, calloused moose paws, all over his gorgeous body- 

Sam groaned into the pillow. This was getting ridiculous. And now he had a boner with someone else’s dick. 

He was back in his own body the next day when he was finally able to check his phone and see the missed calls and the unread text messages. _Hey Sammich, no can do. Bit tied up in a situation. Complex negotiations. You’ll thank me later. You’ll be fine without me. –G_ had come through last night shortly after his prayer. Then, early this morning: _Chess is hard._ Then just a few hours ago he’d gotten _Okay, free now. Wanna try again and I’ll find you?_

Sam glanced over at Dean. They had just started driving and he knew it would not go over well to ask for a break so soon. On the other hand, he now had a phone number. _Can’t pray now, in the car. You were off playing chess?_ He debated before adding a frowny face at the end. He quickly followed it up with _I’m okay though. Don’t worry yourself._

In just a few minutes his phone buzzed in his lap. _Soooo back in your own bod? ;)_ Sam looked out the window, a small smile on his lips. _Same old, same old. So, did you at least win?_ He tried to picture Gabriel playing chess. It seemed unlikely, odd. 

_I’d be dead if I hadn’t_ came the reply. Sam clutched his phone tightly in his hand. Ah. Not a leisurely game. What the hell was the archangel getting into? 

_Now who’s doing stupid things without asking who?_ he texted back. Dean glanced over, having just noticed Sam’s rapid typing. 

“Whatcha got going on there, Sammy?” he asked curiously. 

“Posting on the stamp collector’s forum,” Sam answered smoothly. “Someone found a rare 1903 McKinley with the double head. I had to congratulate him.” 

Dean snorted. “Yeah, I’d congratulate a guy if he got double head, too.” Sam rolled his eyes and reached for his bottle of soda. They drove on in silence. 


	4. let me remember you as you were before you existed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set after "The Song Remains the Same."

_Met another one of your brothers_ Sam texted Gabriel a few days after the trip to the past. Castiel had regained consciousness after his time traveling trauma and had flitted off again. Sam and Dean were preparing to go tackle another case. It was probably a routine possession, but it should keep them busy for a while. Dean had gone to the supermarket to stock up on junk food and beer for the drive, and Sam was supposed to be packing, but instead he was sitting on the bed, texting an archangel. 

_I like it better when you pray so I can come see you_ Gabriel replied. 

“Okay then. Dearest Saint Gabriel the Archangel, hear my voice and find me, here in this crappy motel room-“ 

“Ahhh, much better,” sighed Gabriel, stretched out on the bed, feet crossed at the ankles and his arms folded behind his head. He was wearing dark blue jeans and scuffed sneakers and a white button down shirt, the two top buttons undone. Sam gulped. “So what’s shaking, Samwise?” asked Gabriel casually. 

Sam forced his voice to be smooth. “Well, Dean’s out shopping so we only have about half an hour. I, um.” He fidgeted nervously with his phone. “I haven’t told him that I’ve been talking to you.” 

“Ooh Sammy, I’m your dirty little secret,” Gabriel crooned appreciatively. Sam glared at him as a blush crept up his neck. 

“Yeah, you guys didn’t exactly part on great terms, so I don’t think it’d go over well. Anyway. Your brother…” 

“Oh yes. Well I have several million. Who did they throw at you this time?” 

“Michael.” 

Gabriel sat bolt upright. “You spoke to him? Has Dean-“ 

“No! No, Dean’s still Dean. Dean’s still against the whole vessel thing.” 

“Who was he wearing, then?” 

“Our Dad,” Sam said. “It was so weird.” 

“Wait, but-“ Gabriel frowned in confusion. 

“We were in 1978. Cas- Cas took us there. There was a plot to kill our parents before we could be born. Some of the angels… Anna… but Michael intervened and… he killed her.” 

“Holy shit,” Gabriel breathed. “They’re getting ballsy.” He produced a paper cone covered in pink cotton candy and took enormous bites without any sticking to his face or hair. Sam, again, refused the offered treat. 

“Ballsy enough for you to get involved?” he asked optimistically. Gabriel snorted in derision. Sam turned his head. “So I guess that means you haven’t come up with a brilliant plan?” 

“Same as always. I’m thinking roller coasters now. Might be fun to ride every roller coaster in the world. Wonder if I have time. You like roller coasters, Sammich?” 

“I’m high enough up as it is,” Sam replied sardonically. Gabriel laughed at that. 

“So, how is my bro? He try to sell Deano on things?” he asked, a little more somberly. 

“He has a pretty big stick up his ass...” Sam began. 

“Kid, you did not grow up with him. Yeah, he’s quite a guy. Mister Straight-and-Narrow, huh?” 

Sam sighed, running a hand through his hair. “He thinks that everything has to happen exactly how it’s planned out, that free will isn’t really a thing and we can’t change anything.” 

Gabriel shrugged. “It’s what I tried to tell you. You boys are strong, I’ll give you that. And you’ll put it off and you’ll bend it, but you cannot change the inevitable.” He looked down, shaking his head. 

“So why are we talking, then, you and I?” Sam asked, frowning. “What is this all about, Gabriel? You know, I thought you might- you might want to help me. But you don’t, not really. Maybe I’m just imagining that you-” He choked back the rest of the sentence and stood up suddenly, pacing the room. Gabriel scrambled to his feet and stalked after him, catching him roughly by the waist and spinning him around to face him. They stood inches apart. Sam made no move to flee. 

“Listen, Sam. Listen to me. I want to help you enjoy what’s left as much as you can. Hey, maybe you can even minimize the damage to the world, since you seem to worry more about that than about your own sweet ass. Whatever. I’m here for that, we can figure out a way to get this over with the least painful way possible. And no. No, Samshine, you are _not_ imagining it.” His golden gaze fell upon Sam’s lips and Sam, heart hammering, started to lean down for a kiss. He was going to kiss Gabriel, he was going to do it. Their faces were inches apart and Sam could smell his sweet breath. Would his kiss be as delicious as he’d imagined? Only one way to find out. 

But he found himself instead opening his mouth and saying “Then help me stop Lucifer. Please.” 

“Sam, don’t,” Gabriel said, his eyes darkening with sadness. “Just let us have-” 

“I can’t!” Sam exclaimed, pulling away. “If you won’t help, Dean and Cas and I will keep doing what we can. Go ahead and screw off somewhere Gabriel. I’m sorry I tried-“ He froze as he heard the rattle of Dean’s key in the door. Gabriel gave him one last anguished look before snapping his fingers and disappearing. 

“Ain’t you packed yet Sammy? C’mon, I want to get going.” Dean grabbed an armful of his stuff and hauled it out to the car. Sam sat down to hastily stuff his clothes into his bag, blinking away tears. 

A glimmer on the bedspread caught his eye, a little spark of gold. He picked it up, a single golden feather. He stroked it down his cheek, pressed his lips to it, and then tucked it into his wallet. “Gabriel, I-“ But he couldn’t bring himself to finish the prayer, and he tried to push the whole business out of his mind. Onward to the next case, the Winchesters, off to save the world. 


	5. the light of the universe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in "Hammer of the Gods."

It had been months since Sam had heard from, or had tried to contact Gabriel. Every once in a while he’d have a moment of weakness and desperation and almost do it. But he never could face the thought of confronting Gabriel and feeling the crushing weight of the denial once again. 

But this swanky hotel was getting scarier by the minute. Sam was starting to wish he’d insisted, really insisted, that they leave earlier. They had just been trapped in the main ballroom with a gathering of honest-to-god pagan gods. Sam and Dean looked at each other as the chandelier crashed down. Sam could see in Dean’s eyes that he was desperate. 

_Gabriel_ Sam began silently in his head. _Dear Gabriel, I hope you can hear this even though I can’t pray out loud. Hey, so, we’re in this hotel surrounded by pagan gods and I think they want to use me to get Lucifer and kill him. I don’t know what to do, Gabriel._

The double doors flew open and there was Gabriel, shining golden and beautiful, strutting in without a care in the world. Sam gasped. It hit him in a wave how much he had missed the archangel. He allowed Gabriel’s arrival to give him hope that maybe the archangel had come up with some sort of brilliant plan to stop his brothers’ Apocalypse after all. Maybe Sam had gotten through to him. And maybe after that, maybe he could hope to figure out what this was between them. 

When Gabriel snapped them out of the ballroom, Sam expected to be somewhere far, far away. But here they were in the hotel still. Moments later, Gabriel joined them and explained how they were stuck by the blood spell. Sam felt his heart sink when Gabriel explained his “thing” with Kali and how he was going to go put the moves on her to try to get them free. But it seemed that that was all he was there for, to help free them here and now. He still thought that the end was inevitable. So, nothing had changed. 

Back in the ballroom again, when Kali revealed Gabriel’s identity and then stabbed him through the heart, Sam felt as though the blade had gone through his own heart as well. He sat staring in shock at the dead body. _Gabriel, I love you. I should have told you. I’m so, so sorry that I called you here_ he thought sadly. Yet another person who’d died because of him. Numbly, Sam watched Dean try to rally the gods and offer to work on their side to get Lucifer there. Well, why not. Sam wasn’t sure he cared anymore. 

When Dean announced that Gabriel was still alive, Sam felt the relief wash over him. _Gabriel, just get yourself out of here safely_ he prayed desperately. _I don’t want to get you killed. They know you’re alive- Oh shit. Shit, Lucifer’s here. Gabriel, please, please get away from here._

But no, of course he didn’t listen. No matter what Sam asked of him, Gabriel seemed to do the opposite. Now, now he was going to decide to make a stand and rush in with no plan? Their eyes met for a brief second and Sam knew. Gabriel had come back to save him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have long held this headcanon that Gabriel showed up when he did, not because Kali had asked him (she did, but he was going to ignore it) but because Sam prayed to him. So glad to finally put it in a story!


	6. all the winds let go sooner or later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in "Hammer of the Gods" and after... ish.

Dean and Sam rushed out the door of the Elysian hotel and toward the Impala, steering Kali along with them. Suddenly Sam stopped short and clutched his temple. What, really? Another psychic vision? Now? 

“C’mon!” Dean shouted, shoving Kali into the backseat of the car. “Sam!” 

Sam had seen, in that quick burst of a vision, what was happening inside the hotel. He saw Gabriel trying to trick Lucifer and getting stabbed with his own blade, by his own brother, in the process. “No!” Sam shouted. “He can’t!” Sam was pivoting and running back inside. _Please, please let there be time. Please, God, if you’re listening. Gabriel, you cannot die. I won’t let this happen._

Dean flailed his arms, screaming uselessly after his brother. Kali looked irritated and scared. Dean shouted wordlessly and ran toward the door, following Sam into the hotel, though he could not catch up. 

Sam burst into the hotel ballroom, seeing the scene in his vision. There were two Gabriels and Lucifer was just rounding on the one behind him, the true Gabriel. “No!” Sam bellowed, shocking both archangels. Lucifer turned to stare at his intended vessel, as Gabriel’s projection fizzled. “Stop!” 

Lucifer realized, too late, that he had taken his attention from his brother. That moment of shock was all Gabriel had needed, and the angel blade drove deep into Lucifer’s chest. Gabriel’s face was fierce, but Sam also saw the horror written plainly in Gabriel’s eyes. 

Gabriel dropped to his knees beside his dying brother, his shoulders sloping as he bent over the figure of the man. He gently worked Lucifer’s eyelids closed. Tears streamed down Gabriel’s face and he scrubbed at them with his sleeve. At last he rose to his feet and walked to Sam, who still stood in the doorway in shock. Dean had just come up behind him and stared around in shock at the scene. 

The glamour of the fierce archangel was beginning to wear off, and Sam saw standing before him the broken man who’d just had to kill his own foolish, destructive older brother. Sam enveloped Gabriel in a hug and felt him tremble in his arms. He knew that nothing he could say would come close to being adequate, and tried to bury his relief at the situation deeply for the moment. Gabriel was clutching at Sam’s jacket desperately, as if he might not stay upright without it. 

At last he pulled back and looked up at Sam. “I heard you praying.” 

“That’s why you weren’t surprised,” Sam said. “But he was.” 

“It’s really over,” said Dean, walking over to peer down at Lucifer. “It’s stopped.” 

“And Sam is safe,” Gabriel added quietly. “Angel radio is going to get pretty busy pretty soon. This is gonna get noticed. And until I can do a little fact-finding, I’m not sure how they’re gonna take it. I went off script, and some people might not like the rewrite. In short, let’s get our asses out of here,” Gabriel said, ushering them toward the door. His hand lingered on the small of Sam’s back as they ran down the hallway. 

At the Impala, they looked around for Kali but she was nowhere to be found. “Not surprised that she bolted,” Gabriel mused. He climbed into the back seat, sitting behind Sam. Dean eyed him for a moment, but seemed resigned to giving the archangel a ride, and he began driving them far away from the hotel. 

Sam twisted around in his seat to address Gabriel. “Hey, um, are you sure we shouldn’t… you know, bury him or… something?” Sam imagined the sorrow of having to flee and leave his brother’s dead body behind. 

“It’s just a vessel, Sam,” Gabriel answered quietly. “Nothing to do with my brother, really. Ol’ Nick was just some poor human sap to whom I have no particular attachment.” 

“I’m sorry,” Sam said. “For your loss.” Dean looked over at Sam incredulously, but wisely did not chime in. 

Gabriel stared out the side window, his face emotionless. “Thank you,” he said at last. “But I lost my brother a long, long time ago.” 

“Still-“ Sam began to say, but closed his mouth and shook his head a little. He suspected that Gabriel did not want to talk about it yet. 

After a moment, Gabriel began to feel around on the ceiling of the car, frowning. He then snapped up a long paintbrush and palette of paint and busied himself painting on the ceiling. Complicated angel warding, Sam guessed. Dean was too focused on driving to notice his car being defaced, which Sam decided was just as well. 

Sam drifted off at one point, and when he woke again the paint was dry and the backseat was empty. He sighed. “I hope you’re okay, Gabe,” he whispered, his face turned towards the window so Dean could not hear him. Seconds later, his phone made a ding. He fished around in his pockets and fumbled it open. _I’m fine. And, Sam? I love you, too. -G_

Dean parked the Impala in an overgrown field and the boys slept stretched out on the seats. Until they were sure what was going on with the celestial crew, it was safer to stay hidden under Gabriel’s sigil protection and ready to roll at a moment’s notice. 


	7. subtle visitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel makes a visit home

Gabriel watched from the backseat as Sam leaned against the car window and drifted off to sleep. He brushed a hand gently over Sam’s hair before quietly disappearing from Earth. He reached out for the spot in Heaven where he used to convene with his Father and receive His orders, and projected himself there. Surely Michael and Raphael would be nearby. 

He found himself in unfamiliar surroundings. A wide, white hallway, doors opening off it all along the corridor. It looked like the blandest, most sterile office building on Earth. Gabriel peered in the doors as he walked past. Angels were in most of the rooms, at desks, or filing cabinets, or siting around tables. They were all in a flurry of activity and they scarcely noticed him as he walked by. 

And then Gabriel stopped short. This next door was heavy, foreboding, and closed. And it had Michael’s sigil on it. Gabriel steeled himself and knocked on the door. There was a long pause, and then the door was thrown open at last. 

“I can’t believe it!” exclaimed Michael. “Gabriel! Little brother!” He seemed genuinely pleased, about as much as Michael got, anyway. 

“Hey, Mikey. Good to see you,” Gabriel said. “How’s it hanging?” 

“Ha- what? Nevermind. Have you come home because of the Apocalypse, Brother? It will be useful to have you as an ally.” 

“Well that’s just it,” Gabriel began. “I need to tell you that the Apocalypse is cancelled. I guess news hasn’t gotten out.” 

Michael frowned. “Gabriel,” he began patiently. “I know you dislike the fighting, but you can’t sway us on what must-“ 

“Lucifer’s dead,” Gabriel cut in sharply. There was a stunned silence. 

“Dead?” Michael repeated at last. “But how-“ 

“Me,” Gabriel answered. “He- he nearly got me, instead. I was lucky to be able to-“ 

“Gabriel, this is insane, even for you! You know perfectly well that there are precise prophecies about exactly how the whole thing- I mean, what am I supposed to… oh no. No, no, no. Gabriel, you wouldn’t happen to have agreed to do Lucifer a favor by tricking me, would you?” Michael narrowed his eyes suspiciously at the younger archangel. 

“Why does everyone think that? When have you ever known me to take a side in your fights?” 

“I don’t know, maybe several thousand years of you letting us think that you were dead has changed your habits.” 

“Nope. If anything, I’m more myself than I ever was before.” He stepped closer to Michael, looking him in the eye. “I’m sorry, Brother. Believe me, I missed you all so very much. But it was a huge relief to be out of the hurricane.” 

Michael nodded. “And how was it that you chose to… reenter the hurricane… by having a visit with Lucifer?” 

“I didn’t choose it. It was chosen for me. Some of my friends had a brilliant idea to throw a party and invite him. I tried as best I could to do damage control. In the end, I was barely able to save myself and a few others,” Gabriel admitted, hanging his head in shame. For the first time, he felt the loss of not only his brother but all the friends, enemies, and frenemies that he’d taken out before he died, and the guilt at not having been able to protect them washed over him. 

“Well, if you’d be so good as to give me a location, I’ll send some seraphs down to clean up the mess. I’m not sure how to proceed from here. But I thank you for coming to tell me, Gabriel. I can’t say I’m pleased with what you’ve done, but I am pleased that you survived.” Michael patted him awkwardly on the shoulder. 

“That’s… that’s it? Mike, our brother is dead!” Gabriel practically whined, tears pricking at his eyes again. 

“Well, that was the idea,” Michael said, bemused. “I suppose now that you’re back, we should see about getting you an office.” 

“I don’t want an office!” Gabriel exclaimed. “I’m not staying!” 

“But why not?” Michael asked. “Why don’t we go find Raphael and discuss plans. Surely we three can work together-“ 

“I have things to do on Earth,” Gabriel answered. “Look, I’ll pop by sometimes, but I don’t want an office or executive board meetings or whatever the hell-“ 

“Gabriel!” Michael gasped. 

“I don’t fit here, Mike,” Gabriel said sadly. “You see? I love you. I love you all, but I just don’t fit.” Sadly, he raised his hand and snapped himself away.


	8. the plum of your mouth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief meeting over breakfast.

The waitress refilled Sam’s coffee cup for the third time. He murmured a ‘thanks’ and continued staring at his phone where it sat, quiet and still, on the table. A few minutes later, she came back with the check. Dean glanced at it, snickered, and then handed it to Sam. On the back she’d written her phone number and under that ‘if she never calls you back, give me a call.’ 

Sam rolled his eyes. “You hear from Cas yet?” he asked. 

“No. How ‘bout you? Anything out of Gabriel? I figured he’d stick around with us. It was pretty cool of him to change his tune like that. To be honest…” A proud smirk came over Dean’s face. “I’m pretty impressed that my little pep talk had such an impact.” 

Sam snorted. “Don’t give yourself so much credit, Dean. You’re hardly the only influence-“ 

“Oh come on Sammy, who else do you think he’s been chatting about the end times with? The random jerks he wastes? The figments of his imagination he mojos up?” 

Sam took a big sip of his coffee, and nearly choked on it when he looked up and Gabriel was leaning against the next table, arms crossed, watching the two Winchesters in amusement. 

Sam scrambled gracelessly out of the booth and grabbed him by the shoulders. “You… I almost lost you,” he whimpered. “Oh, Gabriel.” He bent down and pressed his lips to the archangel’s, a brief, chaste brush of lips that quickly morphed into something deeper and more passionate as Gabriel kissed back. Their tongues met and Sam made a little whimpering noise in his throat before remembering that they were standing in the middle of a diner and that his brother was watching. Reluctantly, Sam ended the kiss and pulled back a little. “I love you,” he whispered. 

“I love you, too,” Gabriel replied softly. Their gazes locked, golden eyes meeting hazel as if they were the only two beings in existence. 

Behind Sam, back at the booth, Dean cleared his throat. Sam turned around. 

“Can someone please tell me what the hell…” Dean gestured helplessly. 

Sam shrugged. “It’s a long story,” he said. “Order another piece of pie and we’ll try to explain.” He threaded his fingers through Gabriel’s and slid back in the booth, pulling Gabriel to sit next to him and resting their entwined hands on the table pointedly. 

The waitress approached the table cautiously, eyeing the newcomer. 

“He called back,” Sam said brightly, a dopey grin on his face. 

“And I’ll take a coffee and the stuffed French toast deluxe, if you don’t mind,” Gabriel added. “Want my bacon, Sweetheart? Or should I have them hold it?” 

Sam blinked. “Um, yeah, sure, I could eat some bacon.” 

“Okay, so keep the bacon, and I’ll go with the strawberry filling. Oh, and extra whipped cream.” 

“Anything else, guys?” she looked around the table. 

“I’ll take another piece of pie,” Dean finished smoothly. “Thanks, hon.” He flashed her a smile and a wink. 

Once she had walked away again, Dean turned a glare to his brother. “What the, no really, what the hell Sammy? Something you’d like to share with the class?” 

Sam’s face was tight with tension. “I’ve been talking to Gabriel since just after we got out of TV land,” he said. “We-“ 

“Yeah? Talking to him, huh? With your tongue in his mouth?” He glared at Gabriel’s self-satisfied grin. 

“You know, I typically have a few conversations with someone before I get to that point, Dean.” Sam squeezed Gabriel’s hand a little and felt the reassuring squeeze back. 

“You should never ‘get to that point’ with any non-human. Are you ever going to learn?” 

“I think you’ve got a few things to learn, Dean. Not me.” Sam picked up his coffee and took a quick sip. “So Honey, what were you able to find out?” He turned to study the profile of the archangel, pointedly ignoring Dean. 

“Well first of all, I thought you kids were going to stay safe in the car. I put all that protection on there for you. You’re lucky no one found you.” 

“Is anyone looking for us?” Sam asked. 

“Well Michael’s not. Which probably means none of his posse is. Seems to have gone over better than I had expected.” 

“Look, I get that Heaven is kinda a concern, but there’s a lot of other crap to clean up from this mess here on Earth, and that’s kinda my priority,” Dean cut in brusquely. “So we’ve got demons, and Horsemen, and all kinds a crap running around here. Any bright ideas on that stuff, Hot Shot?” Dean fired off, fixing Gabriel with a steely glare. 

“Well as it just so happens, I’ve been working on the Horsemen issue. Turns out they are critical in the solving Lu- well, they would have been critical in the solving Lucifer problem if- uh, Dean… that DVD I gave you? I take it you didn’t watch it?” 

Dean choked on a swallow of coffee. “No, I haven’t exactly had an opportunity. Really, man?” 

“It’s not what you think. Okay, I mean it is what you think, but it’s also informational. If I hadn’t come out of that last night-“ at this, Sam’s hand tightened on his shoulder “-you guys would have needed to know what I said in it.” He glanced at Sam. “Sooo… since I’m alive and kicking, you can give it back to me now.” 

“It’s in the car,” Dean answered. 

“ _That’s_ how you guard something with your life?” Gabriel exclaimed. 

“Yep,” Dean replied. 

“Ugh. Well, anywho. The gist of it is, the rings of the Horsemen were the keys to opening the cage. I made an arrangement with Death; he was set to give you his. The rest of the Horsemen, I’m afraid you need to take them out. I mean, Death is good, Death is a good guy and he needs to keep doing his grim thing. But the others… even though we don’t need to open the cage and stuff Lucifer back into it, we still need to get those dudes off the playing field. Get their rings.” 

Sam stared at Gabriel. “Was that what the chess was about?” 

“Hm?” Gabriel blinked at him. 

“Chess. You were playing chess and you said it was dangerous. Gabe, did you challenge _Death_ to chess?” 

“What?! Sam, don’t be ridiculous. I played chess with the Fates. Those chicks tag-teamed me. Not- not like that,” he clarified at Sam’s jealous expression. “I had to beat all three of them, back to back, to get them to tell me about the rings. I was going to start looking for the Horsemen next.” 

“I had no idea… Gabe, I thought you were never going to help us. That’s why I stopped praying.” Sam looked away sadly. 

“I know, Sam. I couldn’t let you know. I’m sorry.” He laid his hand gently on Sam’s arm. The waitress reappeared with their orders, and Gabriel focused on his breakfast. Sam nibbled on a piece of bacon and watched fondly as Gabriel devoured the stack of sticky French toast. 

“You’ve gotta try a bite,” Gabriel insisted, brandishing a forkful towards Sam’s mouth. 

“I’m really not that hungry,” Sam answered. “Just bacon is fine for me.” 

“Don’t make me hold you down,” Gabriel threatened. Sam grinned and Gabriel took the opportunity to stuff the food into his mouth. 

“Mmm,” Sam moaned as he chewed. “Okay, yeah, that is good.” 

Dean stared at them in horror. “Are you two finished?” 

“We’re just getting started,” Gabriel said with a wink. Dean groaned. 

“So, about the Horsemen," Dean said. "Well we got War and Famine already. So there’s just Pestilence to find, since you say Death is an alright guy.” 

“You got two out of the three? Hot damn, boys! I’m sorry I ever underestimated you. Okay, so we get Pestilence. Death is already free, all he wanted was to be free of Lucifer’s binding spell. He’ll go back to business as usual. So, what else is on our bucket list?” 

“We should find Cas,” Dean said. “Can you hunt him down with your mojo? I’m worried; last we saw him was when we went head to head with some of the angel gang. Heaven ain’t happy with him and he hasn’t been answering me.” 

“Why didn’t you say so earlier?” Gabriel exclaimed. He grabbed Sam’s chin, pulled him down for a syrupy kiss, and then disappeared. 


	9. you bring me honeysuckle

Sam stared at the table, at the plate of Gabriel’s half-finished breakfast, waiting for Dean to say something. But when he finally glanced up, his brother was staring out the window, deep in thought. Dean must have sensed his gaze and looked over at him then. 

“You trust him, Sammy?” Dean asked. 

“Yeah, I do. Dean, he just killed his own brother to save me.” 

“His brother was the actual freaking devil, Sam. He shouldn’t need a reason. Maybe it’s not about you.” 

“He came because I asked him for help,” Sam answered. “And Dean… if you had to…” Sam shook his head. There was no way to get Dean to look at that analogy rationally. “I love him.” 

“He better not hurt you,” Dean said menacingly. 

Sam rolled his eyes. “I’ll convey your sentiments.” 

They picked over the rest of their food in silence. When half an hour had rolled by and there was still no sign of either angel, Dean paid the bill and they went back out to the car. 

“We don’t know how long he’ll be. Why don’t we grab a room, check out the Internet to see what’s going on out there, check in with Bobby and see what he’s heard, and maybe catch some sleep?” Dean suggested. Sam agreed, and was soon sprawled out on a motel bed with his laptop. The natural disasters that they had become so accustomed to seeing in the news seemed to have dissipated as promised, and they focused their research energies on anything that might be Pestilence. They had made a stack of notes and Sam was starting to drift off when his phone pinged loudly. 

_Where are you?_ read Gabriel’s text. 

“Uh hey Gabe, we’re in the Roadside Motel in Springfield, Illinois, room 34,” he prayed out loud. Dean, sitting at the table hunched over a notebook and a beer, glanced at him in surprise, but he only had a second to process that as Gabriel appeared in the middle of the room with Castiel cradled in his arms. The sickly-looking seraph was wearing a hospital gown and had white blankets tucked around him. 

“Here we are, Kiddo,” Gabriel said gently, placing Castiel on the empty bed. “Now let’s see about fixing you up.” 

“My Grace is nearly drained,” Castiel said weakly. Dean scrambled over to the bed and sat beside him. 

“What did you do to him?” he thundered at Gabriel. 

“All I did was find him and bring him here, you dumbass,” Gabriel snorted. “Now if you’ll shut up and let me concentrate, I’ll try to repair his damaged vessel and pump his Grace back up.” He placed his palm against Castiel’s forehead and closed his eyes. The white holy light flowed between them, and soon Castiel was looking better. His color had returned from the pallor that had been over him, and he started to sit up. 

“Ehhh, not so fast, Cas. Let me reconnect your wires, too. I can’t believe those assholes did this to you,” he muttered. 

“You can reconnect me to Heaven?” Castiel asked in confusion. 

“I can provide the same conduit to the Divine as any of the others can. I have just as much of a right to it as they do,” Gabriel said, a touch whiny. “Now hold still. This might tickle. Or something. Never really done this before,” he added with a grin before pressing both palms to Castiel’s temples. 

The burst of white light was much greater than before, and Sam and Dean instinctively hid their eyes. Castiel shouted, a long scream of pain. When they finally separated, both angels were winded and stunned. Gabriel collapsed onto the floor, and Sam slid off the bed in a panic to pull the archangel into his lap. 

“I’m fine, Sam,” Gabriel said hoarsely. “Just like running a marathon. I imagine. This is what those jocks look like at the end of a marathon, isn’t it?” 

Sam chuckled. “None of them have ever looked this good.” He kissed the top of Gabriel’s head. 

Castiel still sat on the bed, slumped a little against Dean, one of Dean’s hands steadyingly on his shoulder. Castiel reached up to pat it absentmindedly. “I think I’m alright now, Dean,” he said reassuringly. Dean nodded and got off the bed and went back to the table, finishing off his beer in one long swallow. He looked at the row of empties on the counter in dismay and slipped out the door to retrieve more from the cooler in the car. 

Sam helped Gabriel to stand and then sit on the edge of the bed, but stayed sitting cross-legged at his feet. Gabriel, too, seemed to have recovered quickly from the power exchange and probably didn’t need any help, but Sam was enjoying leaning his cheek against the archangel’s knee. 

“We’ve got a few ideas where Pestilence might be,” Sam said, flicking the laptop lid open and showing Gabriel the news stories and police reports he’d dredged up. 

“Alright. You kids sit tight and I’ll go get him.” He brushed a hand through Sam’s hair and raised his hand to snap. 

“Gabe, wait!” Sam exclaimed, catching at his hand. Gabriel stopped in surprise. “Why don’t we just go hunt him? You don’t have to do this all yourself.” 

“Sweetheart, it’s Pestilence. Your gorgeous human bod is kind of susceptible to all the nasties. Let me go clean house and I’ll be back before you know it.” 

Sam rose up on his knees, leaning into the archangel’s personal space. He grabbed him forcefully by the lapels of his jacket and pulled him into a savage, desperate kiss. After the initial surprise, Gabriel slid his arms around Sam’s neck and strained to get closer. Sam at last had to stop to breathe. Gabriel closed his eyes and sighed contentedly, his forehead pressed against Sam’s. 

“Be careful out there,” murmured Sam. 

“You know it,” Gabriel promised, snapping himself away. Sam fell forward, faceplanting onto the bed. He rolled to the side and stared up at the ceiling. 

“You and Gabriel seem to be getting along well,” Castiel said. Sam couldn’t tell if the angel was making fun of him or just making a literal observation. 

“Yeah we… yeah.” Sam agreed. 

“It seems strange to me. I never would have thought there was a hope- that is, a likelihood- of such a relationship between a human and an angel. But then, I suppose Gabriel is more human than most angels, and you are not as simply human as most humans.” 

Sam frowned, even less certain what to do with that statement. Fortunately, Dean opened the door at that moment and came in with an armload of beers. Castiel’s eyes slid to Dean, and then Sam saw it. Of course. Sam turned the idea over in his mind as he jumped up to help his brother set the beers on the counter and open a few for themselves. His tongue ran across his lips, licking the last taste of Gabriel from them before bringing the beer bottle to them and chasing the flavor with cheap domestic brew. 

“Where’s your boyfriend?” Dean asked, poking Sam in the side. “Flighty, that one.” 

“He went to single-handedly take on Pestilence for us,” Sam answered smugly. Dean was silent after that. 

They continued to research, uncertain what else there was to do. There were a few demon signs out there; these they relayed to Bobby to have others check into. Overall, the world seemed to have quieted down. Castiel sat quietly at the table and watched over Sam’s shoulder as he searched, occasionally offering comments. Hours rolled by. The sun was sinking in the sky and Dean had made a beer run and then a call for a pizza delivery, and the pizza was nearly all gone, when Gabriel returned. He appeared sitting on the counter in the kitchenette, surrounded by the empty beer bottles. 

“Well _that_ was not as easy as I had planned,” he said by way of greeting. He shook, stretched, and cracked his knuckles. 

“You okay?” Dean asked gruffly, surprising Sam by beating him to the question. 

“Aww, Deano. Yeah, I’m as amazing as ever. It was just a… multilayered problem, as it turned out. But here ya go.” He tossed the ring into the center of the table. 

“Awesome,” said Dean. “You want some pizza? Beer?” 

“No,” said Gabriel, his eyes lighting on Sam. “I’m not here for dinner.” Sam looked up at him, his pulse quickening. Gabriel slid off the counter and walked over to him with a grin. “Come with me, Sam?” he invited sweetly, his eyes bright with promise. 

“Hey, whoa,” Dean protested. “You can’t just run away together! I know the big stuff is over, but Sam we’ve still got work to do and you’re my brother, man, and… aaaand you’re not talking about leaving forever, are you?” he finished lamely as Sam stared at him. 

Gabriel laughed. “Just a few days. Keep in touch, give us a holler if anything major pops up, but in the meantime…” he gave Sam a heated look and waggled his eyebrows in a way that should have been comical but effectively turned Sam’s knees to jelly. 

Sam let out a breath and slipped his hand into Gabriel’s. “See you soon, Dean, Cas,” he said. Gabriel squeezed his hand as they disappeared into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I *do* have a little follow-up in mind soon, just wanted to wrap this up with a neat ending and maintain the T rating. ;)


End file.
